God My Father
Story behind the song
In December of 2017, my life changed forever. A semester into my junior year of high school, my family moved from Longview, TX to Cedarville, OH. This move completely uprooted me from a stable situation with friends, a church/youth group, and a post-high-school plan, to a place where I knew nobody and had no idea what I was going to do.
The emotional and spiritual journey I undertook in the following months shaped the heart and message behind this song.
After we moved, I became a very angry person — angry at my family, at my circumstances, and at God. I simply could not come to grips with the fact that a supposedly “ever-loving” God would allow such a thing to happen to me! After all those years of faithfully following Him and serving at church and youth group… this is how He repays me? My comfortable life in which I had friends and opportunities... completely stripped away?!?!
I wrestled with these questions a lot — but they only served to fuel my anger.
In retrospect, I can see that this anger was actually blinding me from seeing God’s plan for my life being orchestrated right before my eyes! By refusing to surrender my anger to Him, I was walling myself off from His redemptive power!
Thankfully, I serve a God who isn’t intimidated by my walls.
Instead, as He has proven time and time again, He found a way around my stubbornness so that He could start forming beauty from my brokenness.
In the case of my move to Ohio, He used the gift of new friends, new opportunities, and a new church/youth group to draw me back to Him. As the months passed by, my eyes were gradually opened. I began to see that despite the countless hours I spent feeling angry at God and sorry for myself, He had never once forsaken me. He was unfolding His plan in ways I didn’t expect — and because of my refusal to let go of MY PLAN, I had completely missed it!
I wasn’t trusting in His sovereignty.
The moment I let go of my plans, my ambitions, and my expectations, was when I truly started to experience the freedom that comes in Christ. When I chose to surrender myself and trust wholly in God’s sovereign plan for my life, I felt like a load had been lifted off my shoulders.
And that moment of surrender, is what God My Father is all about.
You see, God never promised that walking with Him would be easy. In fact, Philippians 1:29 says that we have been “granted” the ability to suffer for Christ. What God does promise, however, is that in every situation we encounter, we can trust that the God who holds the entire universe in His hands, is the One holding onto us.
We may still encounter moments of crippling heartbreak and gut-wrenching hardship… and maybe that’s what you’re walking through right now.
If that’s so, I pray that you would find encouragement in the message of this song. God loves you more than you can ever imagine and He will forever be strong enough to carry your struggles, your sorrow, and your doubt — you just have to let Him.
It is true that sometimes He allows bad things to happen to us as a result of the fallen world we live in. But even in those situations, when we’re at rock bottom, God is still holding onto us.
If we learn to surrender our burdens, we can experience a freedom and a peace that is like no other.
It changed my life.
I’m 110% positive it can change your’s too.